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How to help your Russian bride to settle in your country

Research suggests that the changing the place where we live is one of the most stressful situations in our lives - and it's only about moving out from one house and moving into another one, never mind leaving your native town or country.

Can you imagine, you have everything, a job, friends, family and the next day you catch a plane and land somewhere where you know only one person, it's your partner... You don't know anything or anybody. People around speak a different language, they follow different traditions and laws. And on this occasion it's not them who are different, it's actually you, because they are in their home country.

That's exactly what your Russian bride feels when you take her to your country to live.

Most likely she won't have permission to work straight away, the law of most countries need you both first to get married and then depending of the law of the country your bride will have to try to find a job or get some work experience in the country she has arrived in. Meanwhile she will have to stay home while you go to work, keep busy and meet your friends every so often.

It would be great for her to have her own time with her friends without thinking about work, but the problem is she may not have friends in the beginning. A lot of countries don't support the importance of family reunions for single Russian women, brides-to-be have to get used to their new environment. Tough, isn't it?

Good job, they have you, their partner, husband-to-be. Of course nobody expects you to replace all of her friends and family she is used to in Russia and molly coddle with her 24/7. However it's only you who can make her life in your country easier.

Here are some tips which will help your bride to settle in your country quickly and harmlessly.

1. Introduce her to your family and friends. Make sure they are open to her and not suspicious about her as can sometimes be the case with Russian brides. It's very important to feel there are people who know you and are interested in your life. She might find common interests with them and who knows, maybe even become friends. But even if it won't go that far she will have already somebody else to talk to rather than only you.

2. Make sure your bride is always included in the conversation. Of course it doesn't mean you have to discuss shopping and Russian movies with your friends, just make sure she will understand everything you talk about. It's about the language side more than anything; if you see your friends are talking too fast, ask them to slow down. Otherwise your partner will feel abandoned in this conversation.

3. Organize her time. While she can't work give her some purpose to go out of the house during the week. Depending on the financial situation you can provide shopping funds for her, sport such as dance class or swimming. At least a couple of times a week will prevent her from being down. It gives her the opportunity to meet new people and find her own friends.

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How to help your Russian bride to settle in your country

4. Let her make some changes in the house. It might be to move furniture, adding some shelves in the bathroom, hanging a mirror on the wall - all these small things will let her feel at home rather than just moving into somebody's house and not being able to change anything. From now on it's her house as well, remember that!

5. If you have children make sure they will respect her as an adult to begin with. You can't force them to love her because at the end of the day she is new in this house and children don't know her yet, but respect her as an adult and their dad's choice they have to (as well as she has to respect them too)!

This is the most basic advice of how to help your Russian bride to feel comfortable in your country. If you really care about her, you should support her in everything, at least in the beginning. With time it will be easier!

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